I cannot stand that website, madamenoire.com. Every time I check out news on AOL.com, and
the story is on madamenoire.com, I always get sucked into stories like
CELEBRITIES WHO DID THE MOST WHILE PREGNANT, DID YOU KNOW THEY DATED?,
CELEBRITY MEN ACCUSED OF SEXUAL ASSAULT and other nonsense like that that I
really shouldn’t be interested in. So
when I saw CELEBRITIES WHO’VE MARRIED SECRETLY, I should have, but I didn’t
resist the urge. After all, if they secretly
wed, they didn’t want me to know; but if madamenoire.com knows about it, then
I’m going to find out which ones are still secret to me.
Hence I was shocked to see that Michael Ealy has been married for
two years. How did that slip me? Oh, because he is extremely private, and
rightfully so. His wife is of Middle
Eastern descent, a gorgeous woman by the name of Khatira Rafiqzada. Since his wife is not Black, I became curious
to see what the folks in the peanut gallery had to say. Among other ridiculous statements, this one
caught my eye, “He should have married someone black.”
Okay, I don’t always agree with other people’s logic. I might get it, but totally disagree. For instance:
some people think that if they are not feeling well, then they will use
their last ounce of energy to clean the house, in case, God forbid, they die,
and strangers come to a dirty house. I’m
the complete opposite. If I’m not feeling
well, I’m using my last breaths to watch TV to distract me from thinking that
I’m going to die. And in the event that that
doesn’t work, and I do die, I’d be real happy that I didn’t use my last energy
to clean a house for people to come and criticize anyway. First of all, I couldn’t care less what those
people thought when I was alive; so I sure as hell will not care when I’m
dead. Plus, if they come to grieve with
my family and a dirty house is the only thing on their minds, then they
best let the door hit them where the good Lord split them. So although I don’t agree, I understand that
some people don’t want others mentioning how dirty their house is……even in
death.
Speaking of death, another logic I don’t agree with is expensive
funerals. I mean, some of these same
people would say to you, “You are throwing good money away”, if they see you
buying expensive food or something on which they won’t spend a lot of money. However, they don’t think that buying a
casket for $9,000, flowers for $300, a brand new outfit for $200, digging
a hole and putting them all in there is throwing good money away. All they know is that they want to give their
loved ones a good sendoff. But hey, to
each his own!
But the logic of marrying someone just because of the ethnicity is
beyond ridiculous. Now Michael Ealy was
39 when he got married, so I’m going to assume that at that age, he had sown
all of his oats and was quite ready to settle down. He had been dating the
woman for FOUR years. Again, I’m going
to assume that she was the love of his life, the woman he wanted to spend the rest
of his life with, the woman he chose to bore his children.
And now some random person thinks that he made a bad choice, and
he should just find some random Black woman to marry. Who is this person to tell someone else who
he should marry? It makes no kind of
sense to me. But for some reason, these
people who get offended at Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, Jamie Foxx and other
Black men who are linked to White women, have no problem with Robert De Niro,
George Lucas and Roger Ebert. In fact,
they love these men because they seem to date only Black women. They also have no problem with fictional Olivia
Pope sleeping with a married fictional President. And they
swear that Adam Levine had a thing for Tessanne Chin.
I understand the resentment.
If the rich and famous brothers don’t marry the sisters, then how are
they to ever get out of poverty? Oh,
make their own money. If the rich and
famous brothers don’t marry the sisters, how are they ever going to feel
beautiful? Oh, beauty comes from
within. It’s actually not that simple
because there is some form of rejection there, on one hand; but on the other
hand, it’s up to the sisters to find their own paths to happiness. If you drop the typical Black woman in
Alaska, she will sit in her igloo and wait for a good Black man. However, if the typical Black man ends up in
Alaska, the first thing he asks is “Where are the girls?”
If folks can admire the Robert DeNiros of the world, then let’s
give the Michael Ealys the benefit of the doubt too. Let’s not assume that they marry non-Black
women because they want their children to have ‘nice’ hair, that they want to
lighten their offspring, that they feel like they have arrived, that they are
turning their backs on their community, that they don’t love the women in their
families or whatever 'logic' one can find.
Plus, perspectively speaking, we should be busy and content enough with our
own lives than to worry about the love lives of strangers.
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