Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Words Have Power......Bad Words

Whenever I hear people say words have power, I cringe.  I do so because I think it is a ridiculous statement on some level, but I keep it to myself because, to each his own. 

My remarkable memory can be a blessing or a curse… others.  Whenever someone wants to recall an event from long ago, I’m the person to ask.  However, when I remind someone of something promised eons ago, he or she is not happy that I still remember.  I can recall things that happened when I was three years old.  I hardly forget anyone’s birthday or anniversary.  I can account childhood stories and events clearly.  But for some reason, lately, I have been having some difficulty remembering the names of simple, everyday things like bowl, chair, or foot, just to name a few.  Shoot, sometimes I don’t even remember my kids’ names, but most parents don’t.  A while ago, I went to the doctor, and when I returned to the car an hour later, I could not find my car key.  I didn’t remember having it in the office – as if I would remember.  I emptied my bag.  I looked all over the front of the car.  In a passing glance, I noticed something familiar.  For a second I thought to myself, “Why am I seeing pictures of my children?”  Lo and behold, the key was still in the ignition!!!  It could be serious; it could just be stress; or it could be too much multitasking.  I don’t know.  So occasionally I joke and say, “I hope I’m not getting Alzheimer’s.”  I did that once in the presence of the wrong person and was thoroughly reprimanded, “Go ahead and claim that for yourself!”  To which I replied, “Well the good news is, I won’t know.”  Then I heard, “Don’t you know that words have power?”

That really got me thinking.  How come bad words have power, but good words don’t!

Like if I wake up one day and tell everyone to address me as Halle because I’m so beautiful, no one would say, “Sure, Myra.  Words have power; and now that you mention it, you do look like Halle Berry.”  Instead EVERYONE would laugh, to my face at that.  Once, [back in the day when I had a real job…I know; being at home with the children is a real job, (wink, wink)] one of my coworkers told me that I looked like Jada Pinkett Smith.  I didn’t see it then.  I don’t see it now.  I’ll never see it; but sure, I’ll take that compliment any day because I’m a big fan of hers, and she is so damn gorgeous.  She could do well with a few pounds, but that is neither here nor there.  It’s probably our small stature and big personality.  Now! Now!  I’m not saying that I’m all that; I’m just saying that although we are small, we are not timid.

Anyway, when the one co-worker said I looked like Jada, instantly another close coworker replied, “I don’t see it.”  I didn’t even get the chance to enjoy it!  So how is it that every time someone mentions something negative, and it comes to pass, it is because their words have so much power; but when someone says something positive it is followed by echoes of “you wish” or “in your dreams”?

If words really had that much power, then how come I don’t look like Halle Berry?
If my words were so strong, how come I’m not eloquent like Oprah Winfrey?
How come I’m not Mitt Romney rich?  I don’t want to be Bill Gates or Warren Buffet rich because I’d feel compelled to share.  But Mitt Romney rich?  It’s mine; mine all mine - for my children and my children’s children and their children.  I kid, I kid….of course I’d share.

And I’m not going to deny that calling someone a bad word can have some serious negative repercussions, especially if done repeatedly.  I for one feel badly when my children irritate me, and words that I would be ashamed to say in the presence of sailors pour out; but thankfully, they love me unconditionally.

On the other hand, although I don’t think positive words have power either, per se, I don’t understand why people dismiss them more than they do negative words.  And I admit, I cringe when I hear people say, “You can do anything you want if you put your mind to it.”  Not really.  One can do most things if one endures the hard work, but we can’t do everything just by thinking that we can. Sure it’s okay to dream, but once the dream is over, you need to get up off your ass and make that dream a reality.  Ask Oprah Winfrey!  Many people didn’t think she was going to be just Oprah, but she proved them wrong.  However, she didn’t prove them wrong by sitting on her behind, saying I’ll show them.  She proved them wrong by doing whatever it took to become the first black, female billionaire.

And, I can just imagine Oprah at her heaviest claiming that she will be a billionaire and no one taking her seriously.  Yet at the very same time, if she had uttered her fears of contracting diabetes, many people could certainly see that as a possibility, even though some would rebuke her for even thinking it.

Back in high school, before every test I would say a silent prayer, and every single time I received the results, they were always the same.  The times I studied hard, I did well.  The times I didn’t study much or didn’t study at all, I did miserably. 

Speaking of which, there is the height thing.  I always wished I was taller.  Not like 6 feet because it would be a tad bit difficult finding a guy taller than I.  And to each his own again, but I just prefer taller guys myself; but for me, five feet, eight inches is ideal.  Growing up, it didn’t matter how much I wished to be taller, it didn’t matter how positive I was about being taller, it didn’t work.  Don’t believe me?  1) Check my height and 2) pray for something that is not in your DNA!!!

Oftentimes, we let superstition, religion, karma cloud our rationale.  Two people say the same thing at the same time, they rush to see who first says, “Jinx! Knock on wood!”  Someone is stuck in a bad job, a bad relationship, a bad neighborhood, she prays to God endlessly for a better job, a good husband, a nice neighborhood.  Not a praying man?  Then usher your words to ‘the universe’ in the hopes that good will come upon you.  But perspectively speaking, the only time words are powerful is if they are backed by powerful actions.