And the way things are, I never will. Yes, you heard me, I have never experienced
one in my entire life, while many women my age have had numerous. They have shared with me their earth-shattering, mind-blowing encounters, while I can never replicate what I hear. And the thing is: I never will.
Heck, even my 12 year old daughter has had a couple….very tiny ones, but a
couple nonetheless. And she has communicated
to me that many girls her age have had -------- frequently, and sometimes big
ones too. That is quite amazing because like
I said, I have never had one, not even a minuscule one.
When my friends reveal their experiences to me, I am never jealous. Hey to each her own! We are all unique and have different makeups. If they are able to experience them, so be
it. Plus I’m in good company, because none
of my sisters that I grew up with has had any either ….. well nothing climatic …... as far as I know. If any of them has experienced even one, it
certainly was nothing to write home about, or else I would have known.
I can’t even fake it at this point because I wouldn’t be able to pull
it off. Due to my lack of experience, I would
not know where to begin. I really won’t
be fooling anyone. In fact I couldn’t
even fool myself because I would have no clue what to do or no idea what to
feel. Anyone would know that it is not
genuine, and I can just imagine Charles Ramsey saying, “Dead giveaway!” if asked about its authenticity. No one can
help me at this point. My husband cannot
help. Doctors cannot help. Therapy cannot help. But it’s all good. I have to live with it, and that’s that. But I have lived with worse things in my life; so it’s really not so bad.
I know one should not divulge such personal matter in such a
public forum, but this will be our little secret. You know what, I don’t care – tell who you
want. Maybe someone can benefit from my experience,
or lack thereof. I will tell you why I
never had one. And again I’m not seeking
any sympathy. I’m just stating the facts. The reason I never had one was because I was just
11 years old when my mother died; and I was the ultimate Mommy’s Girl. Hence, I have never had a single argument with
my mother. Not even a tiff. Never got upset with her for a moment. Was never angry with her. I have no idea what it feels like to be displeased
with my mother. Not even when I was
naughty and she beat me was I vex. Even
then I figured, I must have done something wrong to get that whipping. After all, I escaped so many, I must have had that one coming.
I was fortunate enough to have her in my life 4,163 days, and
after 32 years of not having her around, I can still look back and say that I enjoyed
every last one of those days to the core. Look I’m pragmatic, and I realize that life
happens. So if you do have a fight with
your mother, it is what it is. I don’t
know your mother like that; maybe she is annoying. I don’t know you like that; maybe you are
sensitive. But, from my point of view
and perspectively speaking, just have a talk with her. Find out what’s at the core of the contention. Take a deep breath. Talk. Kiss
and make up. Because when she goes (and
make no mistake about it, she will go), you don't want to look back and wish
that you hadn't made such a big stink about something that in hindsight was no
big deal.
